8 things to NEVER say to a pregnant lady!

Happy New Year! I hope everyone had a fantastic New Years with loved ones. Mine was pretty tame with the husband and some close friends. Even though my fatigue has escalated, I feel like I've put on 50 lbs in the past week and my feet look like pillow pets with swelling - I decided to still get dressed up for New Years. A lot of you asked about my dress and it was from Francesca's. Non maternity and a size small, the loose shape fit me well and it was quite comfortable throughout the night! 

Available here.

As I'm getting closer to the end of my pregnancy and finally feeling some of the pains of carrying another life for over 8 months now - I thought I would add a little humor in my long days of getting internally kicked around by a 5 lb chunker by writing this blog. I'm sure a lot of mom to be's out there have heard hilarious/off putting comments as they progress through their pregnancy. Here are some obnoxious questions and comments I've been asked in the past month. Oh, and the commentary inside my head when I hear this nonsense.

1. "I hate that name" "I know someone with that name who strangled a baby bunny"

Really? Oh okay, I won't name my child that then. My husband and I have finally chosen a name and are keeping it to ourselves until the baby is here. Prior to finalizing this name, we had a couple we were thinking of and were continuously making the mistake of telling others.. which meant listening to their unwanted opinions. If someone wants to name their kid "dog", just smile and say "nice". It will be the least of the kids problems anyway. 

2. "You're still pregnant!?"

Pregnancy is about 10 months. So yes, unless 10 months have miraculously passed since I last saw you, chances are I'm still making this baby. If you think I've been pregnant for a year, I guarantee it feels like eternity for me. 

3. "Isn't it gross feeling it move inside you? How creepy"

*Blank stare followed by me walking away* Yes, people have actually used the terms "gross" and "creepy". Feeling the tiny little human you created do somersaults inside you isn't exactly gross or creepy. A little weird though? Perhaps.

4. "Good luck. I almost wanted to kill myself during labor."

Thanks for sharing. Not like I'm going to have to go through it sometime soon and I'm already waking up in cold sweats with nightmares that I'm going to fail at giving birth or cuss out everyone in the room. Also, please don't ever mention the size of the epidural needle. Ever. 

5. "Are you really going to eat ALL of that!?"

Yes, yes I am. Remember that part about making a human? Yeah. Where do you think it's getting its food? 

6. "Enjoy___ (sleep/everything) now cause your life will be over after baby"

No way. I thought life would go on exactly the same with Chopped re-runs and quiet alone time with my husband every night after the baby. What does "get lots of sleep" before the baby even mean? It's not like you can bank sleep. It's like saying "Don't eat anything this month because an-all-you-can-eat-buffet is opening up next month". 

7. "It's just your hormones."

Oh I'm sorry. I wasn't aware you and my hormones knew each other... 

8. "You have to go pee again?"

Put a bowling bowl on your bladder and I would love to see how many times you make bathroom runs in a day. 

This is all in good fun. There's a handful of these that make me chuckle every day. Thank you to everyone who has made absurd comments around me these past 8 months. You keep me entertained and have made this pregnancy all the more delightful.